What did he say?

Words fascinate me. We have a daughter living in England and I’m starting to have a hard time understanding her. Oh, her accent hasn’t changed but the vocabulary has. Our little grand-daughter, India, just had a “jab” (vaccination). Meanwhile Heather has been busy “hoovering” the carpets. It’s been a little cold, so you’ll need to wear a “jumper” (sweater).

I’m told Winston Churchill was invited to a proper-Bostonian luncheon during one of his visits to the United States. The women were thrilled and decided to serve the famous prime-minister a typical American meal of fried chicken. (That in itself was pretty remarkable for these blue-blooded ladies!) As Mr. Churchill was being served, they asked him which piece he would prefer to which he answered, “I believe I would like a breast.”

The ladies were affronted by his brazen language. The chairwoman politely explained, “Mr. Churchill, we ask for ‘white meat’ or ‘dark meat.’” The Englishman smiled and the next day sent the hostess a corsage along with the note, “I would be honored if you would pin this to your white meat.”

Language is a funny thing and Christians are often guilty of innocently using “stained glass vocabulary” – language that tends to baffle rather than communicate with our non-Christian friends. For example, if your neighbor asks about our usual music in worship, we might say, “We sing acapella.”  You will probably get a puzzled expression in response. (The Microsoft spell-checker doesn’t know that word either! “Acapella” comes from the Latin for “as in church” – to sing without instrumental accompaniment.) Perhaps a better answer would have been, “We worship un-plugged.”

A plane lost all of her instruments during final approach in a fog over Seattle. The pilot was desperate – especially as he barely missed an office building – but he was quick thinking and shouted at a man in the window, “Where am I?”

“You’re in an airplane.”

The pilot immediately turned to bearing 342, lowered his flaps and made a perfect touch down. The co-pilot was amazed and told the captain, “That guy’s answer was 100 percent accurate but totally unhelpful!”

“Yes, when I heard him, I knew it had to be Microsoft technical support so I knew exactly where we were and landed the plane.”

Not everyone was raised in the church and understands our jargon so our challenge is the same as it always has been: to make the message clear.

Bible Questions

“Are unicorns mentioned in the Bible?”

Yes. If you read the King James Bible (translated in 1611), you can read about unicorns and dragons.

The King James Bible was translated over 400 years ago and includes some wonderful creatures we don’t recognize today. For example we can read about dragons (Jeremiah 9:11 and 34 other places), Sirens (Isaiah 13:22), Satyrs (Isaiah 13:21; 34:14) and unicorns (Psalm 92:10 and eleven other places). The Douay-Rheims Bible (1582, 1609, 1610 — the English translation of the Latin translation of the Hebrew Bible used by many Catholics) even includes griffons (legendary creatures with the body, tail and hind legs of a lion with the head and wings of an eagle, Leviticus 11:13) and lamias (a horrible, mythical creature that ate children, Isaiah 34:14).

Though these mythical beasts occur in our old English Bibles, that doesn’t mean they actually appear in the Bible. The Bible was originally written in Hebrew for the Old Testament and Greek for the New Testament. What the presence of mythical beasts in the Bible means is that the Bible translators four hundred years ago didn’t know the meanings of the Hebrew words. When the old English translators of King James’ day encountered Hebrew words they didn’t have meanings for, they guessed! In the days of Shakespeare, people believed in all kinds of mythical creatures from unicorns to dragons so it didn’t seem strange that these creatures should appear in the Bible.

However, 400 years have passed and we have learned a great deal about the true meanings of these ancient words. As archaeologists and linguists continue to discover ancient manuscripts and inscriptions, previously unknown words are deciphered and defined.

So, for example, the Hebrew word re’em, often translated in the KJV Bible as “unicorn,” actually refers to the wild ox (Bos promigenius or Aurochs – an extinct predecessor of our modern cattle). Likewise, the KJV translators were fond of the word “dragon” and used it to translate many unknown animals including jackals (than: Job 30:29; Isaiah 34:13; 35:7 and elsewhere), crocodiles (tannim: Psalm 73:13; Isaiah 51:9; Ezekiel 29:3) and hyenas (ciyyim: Psalm 73:14; Jeremiah 1:39).

That’s just another reason why it is important to choose a modern English Bible like the English Standard Version (ESV) or New International Version (NIV) for your personal Bible study. However, I want to reassure my grandkids, even though unicorns and dragons aren’t real – I still think they are cool.

Of course this past month I turned 60 so I can sit back in my rocking chair and say things like, “I remember when…” Years ago Vacation Bible School was really just an extended Sunday School class with an assembly where we sang “Booster Booster be a Booster.” Then we ate snacks and made crafts with clay and Popsycle sticks.

Boring… But not any more. Last night our 2013 Vacation Bible School began at Canyon View and it rocked! It was an exciting multi-media production of fast paced learning and fun as you can see from this video compilation.

Thanks to “Lady” Lydia and her never-tiring crew. VBS continues through Friday, July 26th.

I really hate going to the mall. I find them crowded and frantic and full of rude people. On the other hand, I enjoy sitting down with a good cup of coffee and watching the people go by. People watching is great fun and there is no better place than the mall to observe them.

One person in particular intrigues me. You’ve seen him. He walks by the big glass storefronts and stares at his reflection. Perhaps a hair is out of place, or his pants aren’t hanging just right. Narcissus of the Mall quickly makes an adjustment and then grins, self-satisfied. Now comes the fun part. Watch him do exactly the same thing when he walks in front of the next storefront!

In the first century, they didn’t have the fine, silvered glass mirrors that we enjoy today. The best they had were highly polished metal mirrors and mirrors were prized possessions. While I was in Jerusalem a few years ago, I was fascinated with a display of artifacts archaeologists had discovered in a cave in the desert. There was a goatskin bag, stuffed with straw, wrapped around an ancient mirror. As I stared at the mirror, I tried to imagine the owner. Of all the things she could have taken with her as she fled the Roman soldiers, why did she choose her mirror?

We are coming up on fire season in San Diego and it’s important to have a box of essentials packed and ready to go in case you need to evacuate. In that box you might include important papers, perhaps some cash and a few priceless heirlooms but would you include a mirror? I suppose it would depend on how vain you are.

James the brother of Jesus wrote:

^1:22 But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. ²³ For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. ²⁴ For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. ²⁵ But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.

The Bible is like a mirror. It is full of stories and as we read them, we identify with the characters and situations. As we see ourselves in the story, the Bible is like a mirror. The important point is: do we use the mirror as a tool, something that allows us to put things in order, or do we, like Narcissus of the Mall, simply see the Bible as a source of endless entertainment?

I just discovered my dear brothers and sisters at the Raven Street Church of Christ videotaped a lesson I delivered there on September 10th, 2012 during their week-long revival. I’m truly flattered. Raven Street may be a small congregation in size but they have an enormous heart and enough enthusiasm to put churches twice their size to shame. I love preaching for them and I thought I would share the evening with you.

The video presentation is about 34 minutes long and available on YouTube.com (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OYDALg6qpNM) or you can just click the icon below to watch:

I believe the Christian life is life lived to the fullest. This is my Father’s world and so I’ve had many adventures. Each year, since I became a Christian, I’ve tried to learn something new and adventurous. I began sailing at 14 and that was followed by soaring, spelunking, backpacking, mountain climbing, skiing (downhill and cross-country), fly-fishing, scuba diving and many more.

Sometimes the hobby will become an obsession and then there are years I would like to forget. (The year I learned to golf comes to mind.) But one hobby I dearly love is scuba diving. I was so enthusiastic about the undersea world that my dad decided to learn to dive while he was living in Florida. When he came to visit me in California, he wanted to go diving in one of the great kelp forests he had heard me talking about.

I was a bit nervous about taking him there. Yes, they are magnificent. You feel like a giant bird soaring through a magical forest. The rays of sunlight pour down through the leaves and strange creatures swim all around you. But it can quickly become a nightmare if you become tangled or panic. Dad was use to the warm waters of Florida but this is the Pacific and the water is so cold you must wrap yourself in a thick wetsuit. Some people become claustrophobic. There were a thousand things for me to worry about as dad and I waded through the surf and swam out to his first kelp bed. I kept a close eye on him as we submerged.

It was everything I had hoped for! What an incredible day but then I noticed a stream of bubbles flowing uncontrollably from dad’s regulator. Something was wrong! What was the matter? Urgently I beat my knife on my scuba tank to get his attention and signaled “surface.”

“Dad! What’s wrong? Your regulator was running out of control!”

He pulled up his mask and took the regulator out of his mouth. He was grinning from ear to ear. “It’s just like you said son. God did such a great job I just couldn’t help but sing!” The bubbles were the chorus of dad’s hymn to the Creator.

 

³            Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise;
his greatness no one can fathom.

⁴            One generation will commend your works to another;
they will tell of your mighty acts.

⁵            They will speak of the glorious splendor of your majesty,
and I will meditate on your wonderful works.

⁶            They will tell of the power of your awesome works,
and I will proclaim your great deeds.

⁷            They will celebrate your abundant goodness
and joyfully sing of your righteousness.

Psalm 145:3-7 (NIV)

I’m not afraid to admit it: chain saws scare me but can you imagine trying to cut through a log without turning the saw on? That’s exactly how many Christians feel about the Holy Spirit. Although we are promised the gift of the Holy Spirit when we become a Christian (Acts 2:38), many Christians don’t unwrap the present. It’s as if they are so excited about the bow and the fancy wrapping paper, they just put the gift on the mantle above the fireplace for everyone to see.

“My what a lovely package! What’s in it?”

How sad. Without “power” power steering and power brakes are practically useless. The Holy Spirit is our power to change. Have you ever thought about it? Why do we call the Spirit “Holy”? We rarely talk about the “Holy” Father or the “Holy” Son so why do we emphasize “Holy” Spirit?

It might be to distinguish the Holy Spirit from evil or unclean spirits but I think there is more to it than that. Just as Jesus is called the “Christ” because he is the Messiah – that’s his job; so the Spirit is called “Holy” because that is what he does.

Theologians point out how we are justified (“just-as-if-I’d never sinned”) when we become Christians. They also tell us we are continually sanctified (made holy) as we grow in Christ. How is that kind of change made possible? Through the power of the Spirit who is making us holy.

So how do we “unwrap the package?” Paul told the Romans, “those who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God,” (Romans 8:14). We are led by the Spirit when we follow him. That requires us to listen, trust and obey.

Raising children is not for the faint of heart. They seem to specialize in keeping us off-balance so the best advice I ever received on child rearing was to think about them like cats and dogs.

When your children are young, they are like dogs. Our little dog, Charlie, is a refugee from the pound. He’s part terrier and part dachshund with a dash of DNA from the far side of the gene pool. Be that as it may, Charlie loves me unconditionally. When I come through the door, his whole body wiggles with excitement. He barks and races around me and leads me to believe that I am the focus of his life.

Pre-schoolers can be like that too. “Daddy’s home!” Little legs pump furiously so they can wrap their tiny arms around my neck. Butterfly kisses and footy-rides make life grand but then, one day, you come home and everything has changed.

I bought a tandem bike at a garage sale and decided to pick my Junior High aged daughter, Charlotte, up from school on it. She was definitely not impressed and I don’t think she had ever forgiven me for forcing her to ride on with me on the back of it.

The advice? One day, sometime around a quarter to teen, your loving dog will turn into a cat. Cats love you but on their terms. “You may pat me now. You may feed me now. You may have the privilege of cleaning my litter box now.”

“What happened to my little girl? When was my joyful son turned into the troll who lives below the stairs?” Confusion confronts most parents until they realize their dog is now a cat. They still love you, just in a different way.

The good news is, sometime after college you cat will turn back into a dog and it will be smooth sailing again.

It was a tiny, black and yellow puffball of feathers. He was exhausted and took refuge aboard Santa Teresa, our old, wooden sailboat.

It was a perfect day for sailing. The seas were calm off Point Loma and the winds were fresh. Ryan, Derek, and Preston joined Jan and I for one of the best days sailing we’d experienced in San Diego.

The winds caught us as we unfurled our sails and we raced out to sea towards Catalina. Dolphins played around us and Santa Teresa threw up a fine white froth that streamed down the sides as we cut through a bright blue sea. We were laughing and enjoying the day and had just passed into international waters, three miles off the coast, when this tiny ball of feathers flew into the cockpit and darted through the hatch and into the cabin below.

“That was a bird!” someone shouted and just as suddenly the little bird flew out an open porthole, circled us and landed on the rail beside me. Its tiny heart was pounding as it sat there, a fugitive from the sea.

“It’s lost.”

“The wind must have blow him out to sea.”

The little bird hopped down the rail and then flew around the boat before seeking the safety of the rail again. After our feathered friend repeated this exercise several times, Jan ran below and filled a pan of cool, fresh water and re-appeared on deck with pieces of apple, crusts of bread and the pan of water. She carefully set them down on the deck beside the cabin, then stepped back and watched for our little friend to return. He did and looked long and hard at the treats Jan had prepared for him but it must have seemed too good to be true. Our little friend took off and we lost sight of him. Perhaps he hitched a ride on a better boat and made it safely to Catalina.

Later that evening, after we had put the boat away, Jan and I were talking about the little bird. Jan sadly shook her head, “All I wanted to do was help that little bird. He was so small and so desperate. I didn’t want to hurt him. I wanted to give him some water and something tasty to eat. He could have rested and we could have given him a ride back to his friends in San Diego.”

She took another spoonful of soup and looked at me. “John, that must be how God feels. He wants to help us but sometimes we run away.  Sometimes the good news must seem too good to be true and all we do is hurt ourselves and break God’s heart.”

Little bird, please send us a postcard from Catalina. We hope you made it.

 

Thanks to Ryan Gunnells for the photograph!